Tuesday, March 25, 2008

No Mo' Do'

Yup, that's right.


I'm practically broke.

So, I'ma have to cut down on my spending;
-no more wholesome meal for dinner(eg.nasi goreng kampung. LMAO!). Peanut butter and bread will be my dinner from now on.
-no more nice drinks during meals(lunch) at the cafeteria; bringing my own water bottle(GEEK! LOL)
-have to restrain myself from shopping. opt for window-shopping instead when going out at the mall(*puppy eyes at every sale signs I see*)

OK, basically I don't really spend much on anything else other than food here in campus. So, I only have to watch my budget on food. That's pretty hard for someone who just LOVES food like myself here. *sighs*

ohh well, just look on the bright side,
I might just lose some weight from this "operation".
hahahahaah ooo yesssssssss....~

I should start jogging back too while I'm at it. haha.

hope I can do this.




Sunday, March 9, 2008


Dear Blog,

gosh... my last two entries are so EMO and I never realized it until I went through them again just now. hahahaha! It's funny because it's a bit ironic for me to be all emo in my blog since I've been teasing a lot of emo kids lately. HAHA!

But being emo is not bad after all, emo-time is the time where you think about everything more deeply and emotionally(LOL!). Just don't show it too much to people for they might get irritated and annoyed and will consequently isolate you, which will boost further your emo-ness. wahahah!

so people, get an alone time of yourself in your room and be emo as long as you want but make sure to keep away the emo-ness once you get out of the room and try to be normal like everyone else. you're not the only one with problems. just think it that way.


Wednesday, March 5, 2008

Toughen Up

Just when I feel like falling and putting my walls down, I'd feel insecure and would put those walls up again. I'm not brave enough to let anything go through it and see my vulnerability. I think I have issue in trusting and that might just be because I don't trust myself enough to let that happen... or maybe I'm just scared to get hurt and look like a fool.

Or I'm just the fool who's only fooling alone on the other side.
I'm just afraid that that may be the case I am in now..
Thus, my walls are up again
and I'm trying hard not to fall easily over that "little thing" we hear about constantly.
It's kind of hard but it's hard for me to mellow down once I've started to toughen up. But, I hope when I do make myself vulnerable, I hope it's not in vain and it's for the right person. I'm not hoping anything permanent from it but as long as it feels right, I wouldn't mind any bit. Just go with the flow and enjoy it.

But, that time hasn't come yet..
In the meantime though, I have to be wise.
Don't be silly and be clouded by surreal fantasies and infatuations..
Don't confuse those with the real thing.
Things that are too good and sweet to be true are the ones that need to be avoided for nothing is as real as the truth, which is usually not so pleasant and not what we expected and how we want it to be, but that is exactly what we have to look at and try to accept and then only you will learn to know and feel the real thing.

God, help me to be wise. I lack experience in this type of thing. I need guidance...
till then, still confused and hope it will become clearer in times to come..

Monday, March 3, 2008


Dear Blog,

I'm not feeling too confident with myself right now...